Sometimes entering into a new activity allows one an opportunity to explore a part of themselves from a new angle. So much of the way I practice as a flutist informs my trapeze practice. However, sometimes as a flutist, I develop hang-ups. Taking on a new activity can sometimes offer a route around old hang-ups.
Yesterday I performed on flute in front of a group of people (at church) for the first time in months. During a run through just before the service began, I became extremely nervous–to the point of losing control of my vibrato. As I looked up, I noticed how small I felt in the space. Feeling ‘small‘ is intimidating. I wanted to feel ‘huge’; I wanted to own the space and claim for my own–just like I do when I fly. I reflected upon my trapeze experience and how it allows me to feel like a rock star. I took that mentality and applied it to the musical situation I was in at the moment. I allowed myself to remain aware of the depth and height of the space I was in; I played to the far corners. The result was a calm and confidence that allowed me to enjoy the performance. What’s better than feeling like a rock star?